This post concerns the Artemian Huntress whose gaze captivated me so many years ago, and whose presence forced in me a leap in my starry enlightenment. Who i swore fielty in my privacy and then broke in public, damning me to six seasons of acrid and unforgivable guilt.
It has been now two years since i left the academy, lingering there for two more seasons to be set free of my scholar’s binds
still i long to see her gaze, still i want to be her knight, to prove myself in battle, Like a crusader’s ghost, forever wandering across the oriental sands in search of an enemy or marching company that will never come…
But i learned the wisdom of the universe; i waited and i hoped, on and on under the spinning clouds of eternity
My soul rose as i was called, clad in new armor, and wielding a splendorous new blade, a halberd forged from the divine metal that Yah’s fighters use; my master finished whispering his decree to me with “know this and conquer”. And i rose glorified and filled with misty-eyed purpose, i knew i had to find her again. she was the door and i was the lock, but where is the key?
For some reason i feel that if given the opportunity, that we would fit like yin and yang. A foolish, illogical assumption that i cannot take as infallible truth because of my creed to truth. But still the notion persists, buzzing through my thoughts and filling my dreams wit the sweetest incense in which i must never let my nose indulge, until she becomes the hierophant, and allows me to enter
Oh my gosh! It’s too much awesome! Oh the things you can do with simply paper! Sooo all I would have to do is print, cut, fold and glue, and I’ll have myself a 3D paper figure? That’s pretty awesome! Though I don’t think I could be creative enough to make a pattern all on my own. I’ll just…
This is Awesome.
See, i love papercraft. It’s fun and easy to do. A few months a go i made the great temple at Angkor Wat our of paper, i thought it was some cool beans and ive been wanting to make more things, but all i had found were lame-ass things.
I want to make a few of these, but im not going to just yet, i still have a pending project to finish that is on its so-very-close/so-far-away lap.
This is in response to that post that was linked earlier, the one mocking FYCG.
I understand how people work. I know that they use the internet to say horrible things and judge others because they can hide behind their screens and keyboards in order to say the things they wouldn’t dare in public. They are cowards, typing from hundreds and thousands of miles away so they don’t have to see the hurt on the faces of those they belittle.
Whatever, fine, that’s not going to change. But that doesn’t mean I don’t have something to say about it.
Am I fat? Shit yes I am. And I know exactly why I’m fat (and it’s not from fast food, because I’ve cut that out of my diet, and guess what? I’M STILL FAT). I don’t exercise, and I eat processed foods because they’re easy to prepare or grab on the go. But I am also a compulsive over-eater, which, guess what, is considered to be under the umbrella of “eating disorders”. I could join a gym and go seven days a week and it wouldn’t change a thing if I still came home and ate enough food for five people in one sitting.
So what right does anyone have to say that I am “a lazy fat fuck” or a “fat piece of lard” when they don’t even know me, and they don’t see me sobbing in my bed at night after a binge? They don’t know what it’s like to feel like you’re not in control of your body, to tell yourself nononononono and still reach for a sandwich and a bagel and whatever else is in the fridge. To know you shouldn’t, to want to put it down, to cry when you eat it anyway because youhonest to God cannot help yourself. Things like this are exaggerated in popular media for the sake of jokes, but they happen. I am a walking, talking example of it, and there aren’t words for the anguish it causes me at times.
Do I deserve to have jokes at my expense? I try my best every day to be a good person, to be kind to everyone around me. Isn’t that good enough? No? Okay, I try to make people laugh. I try to comfort people when they have a bad day. I help my parents by buying groceries when I can. I taxi my little brother around town. I work customer service in a toy store (and doing that at this time a year should ALONE cement respect for me, just saying). I am always kind to strangers.
Can I have your respect now?
No one has any right to judge me, to judge people like me, or to judge ANYONE. You do not know what is going on behind the scenes. I would rather be an obese, kind, fun, friendly, good person than a judgmental and cruel one.
Do not let those who are sanctimonious and mean (whether in real life or hiding in the safety of the internet) make you feel bad about yourself. You know who you are. Just be the best you can be, and try to have fun.
Tony Stark has been a war profiteer, a playboy, a Super Hero financier, an electronics pioneer, a humanitarian, a business consultant, a computer technician, a super-spy and even the US Secretary of Defense. But always at his core, Tony Stark has been Iron Man, a visual symbol of heroism, change and faith in science to shape a better world.
The first time I was ever self-conscious of my weight was when I was a freshman in high school. There was a girl that I talked to a lot, and we kind of liked each other, but it didn’t work out. After we “broke up” (if you could call it that, because we only “dated” for four days) we still talked to each other, but then one day in study hall she started kind of making fun of me and poking me in my stomach and stuff.